Category Archives: Dewsbury

instant winner

Just thought of a brilliant money spinning idea, so good I almost daren’t share it in public in case one of you cunts nick the idea off me. Inspired by the disappearance of Shannon in Dewsbury, the softheaded little girl with over a hundred siblings found safe and well with her stepfathers, brothers, uncles, brothers, son or something, the news coverage inspired a single mental image of a business so magnificently apt that I was virtually knocked to my knees by it’s sheer immensity.

Mobile Baseball hat / kebab shop.

As none of these interbreeding scum can drive, and, judging by the obese electorate, they don’t walk much either. Of course, everyone wears a baseball hat in Dewsbury, everyone, from babies to 30-year-old grandmas. The opportunity to stuff a Donar down your cake pipe whilst perusing the latest in knock-off designer headgear would see me on the Dragon’s Den panel sooner that you could say ‘compromised pictures of nippers’.

Short Piqued today, I have work to do on account of getting involved in a discussion in WatchwithMothers yesterday (link right, titled under Eastenders) with Swineshead and that Napoleon character. It made the day pass quickly and entertained me immensely, especially as I won the argument with romantic dignity and trademark wit but as a subsequence I didn’t achieve much on the work front.

Yesterday evening I returned from work and met up with the aforementioned Swineshead in my local. We chatted about the day in hand but mainly talked behind the back of an associate as we supped beers and laughed ourselves hoarse. Harry joined us a bit later, he himself was a little worse for wear following a long lunch with colleagues and after some more giggling I returned home at 10.30pm, four pints down and feeling utterly exhausted. I was only good for bed and book (Ackroyd’s biography on Poe makes for splendid bedtime reading) and by midnight I was asleep. Day done.

The weekend has suddenly exploded with options and invitations, I’m not entirely sure what to accept and what to decline, the only sure thing is lunch with my bro on Sunday and the rest is of my choosing.

Before I go, here is the edited Friday list and then a popular tune.

Oh, good weekends all, farewell and goodnight.

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