Category Archives: underworld

sub hum enz

Last night I met Colin in Camden. I’d not seen him since Myfwt and I went up to Leeds for his 40th and by sheer luck he was able to make it to a popular music concert that I was facing the prospect of seeing on my own due to the lack of interest from mates.

The weekend had begun rather well following a dismal Friday afternoon in the office having failed at lunch to secure the last of the Christmas fucking shopping. At 6.30 I met up with Harry and Frank in the local for a couple of pints and left those two to touch cockends at about 8 in order to see Myfwt back at the flat. She was exhausted following another ridiculously successful day, which had subsequently unleashed the green-eyed monster from the dribbling bitch in her workplace, so I patted her down and made her some steamed haddock with a few glasses of Rioja in front of the TV.

The following morning after a spell of Saturday kitchen in bed where some miniscule overseas twit said ‘fucking’ whilst showing off to camera and then tried to appear really interested in what was happening because he knew he’s fucked up substantially, after that we went out. Myfwt had a lot of Christmas shopping to do and I was happy to tag along, yes, you read that correctly. I don’t mind Christmas shopping with her, despite being totally disorganised she has this way of connecting me to that childish anticipation of Christmas, I’m not entirely sure why either. It was a splendid afternoon but sadly curtailed by Myfwt having to visit a friend in the early evening. I found solace in the pub with Frank and his missus and returned home to suffer Hostel 2 which is fucking dreadful, the effects are appalling and it goes for the lowest common denominator in terms of cheap shocks -executing children for crying out loud. Bollocks.

Foolishly, following that, I put my headphones on and kissed mother earth goodnight. I woke Sunday feeling a bit squiffy but remarkably well. Ted popped over for a cup of tea and a few spliffs at lunch and we caught up, he seems to have become a sort of country gentleman, the bucolic life suits him well and I found myself yearning for sprawling trees, fields dotted with cows and fat angry racists, perhaps I’ll exchange the latter for the crawk of crows. Ted, bless him, brought me a Christmas present which couldn’t have more astute if it had screamed bollocks and spat in my face.

The reason Colin and I were I Camden was to seeing the Subhumans and the gift from Ted was the gift of music, in the form a 3 rare EP’s from the aforementioned band which he and I listen to as we sipped tea and discussed butter. By the time I arrived in Camden Colin was already at the World’s End trying to score a pint, the pub, a huge boozer not really known for its subtlety was already furnished with some proper old fashioned punk fellows, mowhawks, spikes, DM’s, studded leather, bondage trousers… I wasn’t exactly looking tidy but by these chaps I could’ve been wearing a fucking whistle. We finished our pint and went next door to get tickets from the box office; the collection of punks outside the venue was reminiscent of 1977 on the Kings Road, lots of posturing and swearing but nothing threatening, even a Scottish chap with ‘Celtic fuck off’ (among other things) tattooed on his head who was a little bit cross about everything melted when security asked him to be patient and wait his turn in the queue.

Colin and I got our tickets and went back into the pub to carry on drinking. As luck would have it, Dick, the lead singer of the band passed our table and of course, being the congenial fellow I am I made my acquaintance and lent him my chair so he could have his tea. Colin, Dick and I chatted for about 20 minutes, we discovered that this was the last gig of the tour, that people in Newcastle were very lively when they played, that people in Bristol were not, that he listens to dub reggae and classical music when not being a punk and that he was rather surprised by their recent popularity. We also discovered the band were on at 10 giving Colin and I even more time to drink Guiness. After a skinfull we arrived at The Underworld just in time to catch them play, they were magnificent, they played 2 of the songs from my new EP’s and one of my favourite tunes of all time. The crowd at the front were having a riot but it was all good natured stuff whilst Colin and I observed from the balcony occasionally punching the air, like.

After we enjoyed a drunken stand off with a shawarma, one of the best I’ve ever had, I missed the last tube home. Colin was able to make his as he was going North so after a fond farewell we went our separate ways. I was transported back to my flat by a large racist fellow from Sierra Leone, we had a blazing row for virtually all the journey which was rather fun actually.

Today I have a hangover, but I am soothed by the fact that this the second to last day in the office for 2007. Terrific.