salad tosser

I feel shit this morning. I wouldn’t mind but I barely (relatively) drunk last night. I had two pints of IPA in the beer garden with Frank and a can, 1 bloody can, of Calsberg when I got back. I put it squarely at the feet of exhaustion and over indulgence following the weekend.

Yesterday was cack. I could barely keep my eyes open at work, business just wasn’t happening and my Slayer wallet hasn’t arrived. The post here doesn’t arrive until gone 11 so I was like a dog with two, not one, but two members until discovering that the post wasn’t bearing my goods. In fact I’m currently waiting for 2 other items and they’re late too. After that I sort of gave up. If I’d been old and infirm I would’ve probably slipped ‘next door’.

When I cycled back home in the afternoon, I could barely be pissed to pedal and as a result got back ten minutes later than I would if I’d made some sort of effort. If it wasn’t for the appointment with Frank I may have been tempted to take to my bed like a Victorian Duchess. After the drinks I got home and made a marinade for some chicken breast (olive oil, thyme, parsley, chives, seasoning, lemon juice, Dijon mustard, caper vinegar, dash of Worcester sauce and Tabasco) and violently slammed them in the mixture before shoving them in the fridge for an hour. I watched University Challenge, which seemed (comparably) pathetically simple this week before being flabbergasted by Nigella’s ‘Express’ dishes. Despite the fact that I still would, the programme really is awful; I also discovered that the kitchen is a mock up of the kitchen in the house she shares with Charles Saatchi, it’s in a studio off the south circular, so accurate is it that it even comes with children’s drawings. Actually, whilst were on for exposing BBC things, it’s a badly kept secret in the BBC (and comes from a friend who knows the chap in question) that it was Peter Duncan that vandalised the Blue Peter garden following his sacking from the show and a night in the BBC bar.

After I’d cooked the chicken and some streaky smoked bacon, I tore up the former, shredded the latter and combined with rocket, watercress and spinach. I made a dressing by shaking together olive oil, vinegar, garlic puree and capers, before tossing the whole fucking lot together. I’m not really a salad fan; this was so good I got a chubby. I ate the lot in front of a superb programme about The Dandy and The Beano on BBC4, By 11pm I was in bed with a joint and a cup of tea.

Short Piqued today, I’m very busy.

This bird is fucking 50 She’s looking terrific don’t you think? Enjoy her first solo outing since she split with hubby.