Category Archives: joy division


I’m not going to dwell on the fact that I was meant to be going to San Francisco this evening to ride across the states, I refuse to. Do you hear?

I’ve been torturing myself watching The Long Way Round with Myfwt (review in WWM, link to the…oh you know) and last night they hit Alaska, they’re both getting all excited because they’re soon to be in fucking New fucking bastard York. I refuse to dwell on this.

Following the damn good thrashing I gave my black bitch on Sunday, she loved it, I’m now paying the piper, me, then. This morning there was hardly enough juice in the battery to turn the motor over so when I arrived at work I removed it from it’s housing and brought it into the office. I have a battery charger I keep knocking about for such emergencies; I’m thoughtful like that. Anyway, in the process of removing said battery I noticed the oil level has disappeared, there is no water in the radiator reservoir, the chain is so dry that if one were to add boiling water to it, leave to stand for 5 minutes, stir in some soy sauce, it would be ready to eat.

Right, short Piqued today. I did mention this might happen, I have to sneakily do some work on the book in addition to the stuff required of me in the bloody office.

Saw this lot at Kingston Poly in 1989; the bands parents were there. Perhaps more significantly, waiting for them to appear on stage, it was also the first time I heard Nirvana, I thought they were terrible for exactly 10 seconds, before suddenly getting swallowed up. Oddly about 20 minutes later I ’got’ Joy Division

morsel of the universe

I spent yesterday evening in the pub in the company of two teachers and a deputy head. It was very interesting picking up on the day-to-day delights of working with kids, but what was more of an issue was the whole machine of the education system. The old cliché of public money being spent on phoney overseas wars and teachers in ever expanding classrooms in failing schools being paid beans permeated my thoughts like a left over member of Kinnock’s Labour Party. I drank 3 and half pints, did a quick scotch and walked home.

By the time I got back it was past 10, not being arsed to cook I toasted some pitta bread which I scissored into shards and used them to dip into a fresh pot of Taramasalata and smoked salmon. It was delicious, moorish, then slightly nauseating. I ate it all.

On BBC4 there was a programme about Time. For BBC4 it could’ve been considered a little patronising, but for a chap who’d had a few pints and suffers from numerical dyslexia it was fucking mind blowing. Apparently the earth is something like 4000 million years old. Obviously this is a lot but such a large number doesn’t really mean much, my tiny little mind can’t comprehend it. To help us (me) to comprehend the presenter did the following.

In his apartment in New York at one end of a 7-foot long table he put a little photo of himself down, 10 cms behind that he put a photo of him as a baby, each cm represented 5 years. At the other end of the long table he put down a little shield to represent the time the Romans invaded Britain. He then walked out of his apartment, got into his car and drove to San Francisco, some 2500 miles away. And that demonstrates how old the earth is…to understand such an enormous figure caused my tongue to come out of my face. Following this revelation I saw a programme on the Atom, not having had the slightest interest in science, such things involve too many numbers, I was really pushing it in terms of taking on new information. I was squiffy, it was gone midnight. I rolled a joint. At about 12.45, I got it; I actually understood what the fuck an atom was, how it worked, what it meant, dammit all. I stood up enlightened as if to get the information into my system. I felt liberated but then, yes, a part of the universe in which I occupied, one vibrating hum of randomly moving matter, everything around me, my flesh, these walls, my whisky, (my winkie) Christ, Moby was right, we are all made of stars!

I woke up this morning with a hangover and I’ve forgotten most of the atom shit, balls. I can tell you though that Taramasalata makes you do the most incredible farts.

It’s horrid day to day; the summer seems to have fucked off under a rock. Christ, autumn is coming. When I began Piqued in January I was at least facing forward towards spring. Now should you wish to stay, you will have to endure me sliding gradually towards the dark and misery of another bleak and miserable British winter. I fucking hate it.

I should’ve mentioned this yesterday that Tony Wilson turned up his toes over the weekend. Great loss, bit of a berk sometimes but ultimately a top chap.

joie de vision

I’d forgotten to mention that I was acutely aware during Thursday’s gig that this would be the last time I could (legally) smoke in a venue. I’ve tickets for motorhead before the fucking ban but as it’s in the Royal Festival Hall smoking isn’t permitted anyway. Indeed, I’m now very aware that I’m on borrowed time as far as smoking in pubs is concerned; it feels like the end of an era approaching. Balls. I hate change.

Another thing, the swervedriver video I posted in Fridays blog, the red motorcycle (it’s a Ducati 900ss) I used to have one of those. It’s a miracle it made it to the end of the video, mine was more unreliable than radiotherapy.

So, what’s been going down this weekend, yeah, well, not much frankly. On Friday afternoon Myfwt came round for a cup of tea and a chat, it was lovely to see her despite her not feeling on top of the game. After a couple of hours she left to do some work, I did some housework which included fucking hovering, a task I despise out of all proportion. I’d decided that due to the previous evening hedonism that I wanted to share a night with the self, I nipped out to get some tobacco and settled in for the evening. At least my carpet no longer looks like Brighton Beach.

I was an unremarkable night but very much needed. I read, started a short poem and watched TV with a few G&T’s, spliffs and roast chicken wallowing in gravy and cooked to perfection roasted potatoes and steamed vegetables. Jools Holland was the highlight of the evening, it has to be said that if you have any passion for contemporary music, there will always be something to tinkle ones fancy, in this instance Wilco, LCD Soundsystems and surprisingly, Joan Armatrading.

I was woken late Saturday morning with a phone call from Myfwt, she was going away for the weekend so I went back to my pit and slept until early afternoon. After a bath and late lunch I spent the afternoon looking at grot on the PC before watching Apollo 13. Early evening I met Frank up the road for a drink. Our usual venue was stuffed full of no neck cropped haired wankers all yelling at a large flatscreen TV, we decided to leave them to it, it’s wonder their knuckles weren’t wearing shoes.

We convened in this bland wine bar cum eatery and were forced to drink fizzy bastard Carling in lieu of man’s ale. At least the place was quiet. Frank and I discussed Joy Division and this which beggar’s total disbelief. I wandered home after a few pints following a short visit to fucking Tesco, the bane of my consumer life for a bottle of wine and crabsticks that I think I’m addicted to. BBC2 came to my rescue in the form of The Seven Ages of Rock featuring Pink Floyd, Velvet Underground, David Bowie, Genesis and most inappropriately, Roxy Fucking music, or Poxy Music as my dad calls them. What the fuck were they doing there? Utter shit, who did they influence in the 70’s apart from The Yorkshire Ripper, probably. In order to cleanse myself of Brian Fairy and the girls, I bathed in session of progressive rock and metal, which saw me well into the small hours. I went to bed a little squiffy don’t you know.

I was up in time for the Grand Prix on Sunday. Monaco, one of my favourites despite the circuit making overtaking almost impossible. It was an impressive race, if a little samey, due to the two victorious Mclaren’s and the continuation of the remarkable fledgling career of Lewis Hamilton, 19 years old with makings of a world champion, so long as the team orders on Sunday weren’t the thin end of the wedge as far as he and Alonso are concerned. I can tell I’m boring you, I don’t care really. Okay I do.

I met my bro at 5 for a pint at the Sunday usual as he had some dinner appointment with his missus and friends at 7, we drank wine, some quaffable Spanish fare because he’d just had lunch with our folks and had a few glasses on board and didn’t want to mix his poisons. The subject of Poxy Music being on that BBC2 Rockumentary came up, my bro informed me that dad wasn’t impressed either which comes of no surprise. My dad isn’t an aficionado on all things ‘rock’ by the way but he’s fairly well versed in 60’s ‘pop’. I remember when I was about 7 telling him that I thought The Monkees were much better than The Beatles, dad was under the Maxi (he was always under some Leyland design fault in the 70’s) but he downed tools, popped his head out from under the door sill and yelled ‘don’t be so fucking stupid’ so loudly my mum heard him in the back garden. I still think I’m right by the way, fab four my arse, Jerk, Prat, Git and Ringpeice.

It’s worth noting that since Friday evening it’s pretty much been raining constantly. The upshot is that I’ve been forced indoors for virtually the whole weekend and bank holiday, save a few trips to the pub to see Frank and my bro. The flat is now entirely spotless; I’ve even had time to purge my clothing rail. Actually, I’m bored fucking shitless, I especially wanted to take the black bitch out for a ride. On the upside my head has been farting out ideas, I wrote a poem and after an hour of drunken deliberations over a succession of evenings concluded that all art was the subjective manifestation of projected thinking. As I type this it’s Monday afternoon, I’m meeting Frank for a pint in a couple of hours then home to eat and watch a film.

I’ll leave it to Ian and the boys to provide today’s entertainment. (I think Ian may be on drugs, maybe if he’d read that story in the link he’d still be with us today)